This is the official blog of Northern Arizona slam poet Christopher Fox Graham. Begun in 2002, and transferred to blogspot in 2006, FoxTheBlog has recorded more than 670,000 hits since 2009. This blog cover's Graham's poetry, the Arizona poetry slam community and offers tips for slam poets from sources around the Internet. Read CFG's full biography here. Looking for just that one poem? You know the one ... click here to find it.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

"Enraptured" by Randy Warren

By Randy Warren

It seems for most my life,
we’ve been waiting for the day.
The day everything changes,
and all the bad things go away.

We had Harmonic Convergence.
Millennium came and went.
We watched for love’s emergence,
but those dates, made not a dent.

And now with 2012 a-looming,
all of us are now assuming
that we soon will go a-zooming
to our final fate.

But I for one am truly hoping
that we all can stop our moping
and begin our fruitful groping
for another date:

The Rapture.

For those of you who aren’t aware,
the Rapture is that last day where
the dead will rise up from their graves
and all good Christians will be saved!

Their bodies will evaporate,
their mortals souls will elevate.
The trumpets sound,
and all around ... there’ll be no Christians to be found.

And what becomes of all the rest?
Those poor souls who just “did their best”,
and spent their Sundays sleeping in,
and actually enjoyed their sin?

Well, first we’ll form the cleaning crews
collecting jewelry, clothes and shoes,
and other things, too much to mention,
the Christians dropped in their ascension.

And then there’ll be a global pause,
a massive dropping of the jaws,
as all us sinners comprehend
that what for some has been the end
for us is only the beginning
of a Golden Age of Sinning!

A cheer will sound around the Earth,
to herald humankind’s rebirth!

We’ll walk buck-naked down the street!
Have intercourse with those we meet!
We’ll do hard drugs in public spaces,
sloppy grins upon our faces!

We’ll never go to work again!
If China wants to win, it can!
Economy, esch-monomy,
we’ll now have our autonomy!

A new world springs up overnight
where we’ll just have no need to fight.
We’ll finally have our world peace
once everybody gets a piece!

A fun and happy global nation
with no need for masturbation.
Though that action will continue,
but for show, in public venues!

Folks will feel good all the time!
They’ll give up on the social climb.
With no one left to judge our actions,
life will be pure satisfaction!

Money will just be green paper.
Credit cards become pan scrapers.

Ecstasy will be the norm,
As we expand to our true form!

... and yes, one day, far down the line
there will from heaven come a chime
as Christ himself descends upon us
to lay his massive trip upon us.

Hopefully we’ll make him see
that all throughout eternity
all of God’s creatures, great and small
just want to smile, and have a ball!

And even though we only prayed
on accidents while getting laid,
or trying to help our sports team win,
perhaps He’ll see that all our sin
was just us trying to be God too,
and act like God appeared to do

by being all things, dark and light.
Keeping the peace...helping the fight.
Robbing one man to pay another.
Hating Mom...and loving Mother.

We’ll ask Christ, can we take the blame,
when his own Dad made up the game?
And set up rules in contradiction
to our human predilections?

How could we expect to win
when God made us to lust for sin?

Perhaps then Christ will see our side
and come to Earth where He’ll reside
and live amongst us as an equal
and help us write the bible’s sequel!

“The Bible Two – The Fun Begins!!!”
Where it’s all good, and no one sins,

and everything is all okay,
and everybody gets their way,
and every day is Saturday.
and everybody, straight or gay

just laughs and sings and plays all day,
and never once
bothers to pray.

Because it’s all just really good,
and everyone feels like they should
and Paradise is here and now
and no one ever wonders how.

So yes, I’m waiting for the day
when Rapture takes them all away.
Until then, I’ll just watch the sky
and listen for the trumpet’s cry

And hope that when that day does dawn,
and we can finally get it on,
that one commandment we employ:
“Thou shalt always, be in Joy”

Copyright 2010 © Randy Warren

According to his bio, Randy Warren is an ascended master of the material illusion. He has come to Earth to assist in smoothing the transition into the new age. While here, he enjoys many forms of expression, including poetry. Feel free to contact him and offer him money for his myriad talents.

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