This is the official blog of Northern Arizona slam poet Christopher Fox Graham. Begun in 2002, and transferred to blogspot in 2006, FoxTheBlog has recorded more than 670,000 hits since 2009. This blog cover's Graham's poetry, the Arizona poetry slam community and offers tips for slam poets from sources around the Internet. Read CFG's full biography here. Looking for just that one poem? You know the one ... click here to find it.
Showing posts with label Klingons. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Klingons. Show all posts

Sunday, April 14, 2013

National Poetry Month: Klingon Chancellor Gowron performs Lewis Carroll's "Jabberwocky"



"Jabberwocky"
By Lewis Carroll

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

“Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!”

He took his vorpal sword in hand;
Long time the manxome foe he sought—
So rested he by the Tumtum tree
And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

“And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!”
He chortled in his joy.

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.



Gowron, son of M'Rel, was Chancellor of the Klingon High Council in the late 24th century. He ruled during the Klingon Civil War, Klingon-Cardassian War, and the Dominion War. 

Before 2367, Gowron was a political outsider on the Klingon High Council, who often challenged their decisions. After the death of Chancellor K'mpec, Gowron and Duras, son of Ja'rod became the two leading candidates for leadership of the council. It was suspected that Gowron had in fact poisoned K'mpec to advance his career although many believe that K'mpec was indeed poisoned by Duras.

Duras attempted to kill Gowron during the Rite of Succession, but the attempt failed. Duras was killed by a Starfleet officer, Worf, thus ensuring Gowron's election as chancellor.

Following Gowron's election, Duras's sisters, Lursa and B'Etor attempted to challenge Gowron's office. They appealed to the High Council to install Toral, the illegitimate son of Duras, as Council leader. The resulting division of loyalty in the council sparked the Klingon Civil War in late 2367.

After a few weeks, Gowron's side was victorious. With the help of the Federation, Duras's family was exposed of having ties with the Romulan Star Empire. In addition, Gowron reinstated the House of Mogh because of the actions of Worf and his brother Kurn coming to his aid in the conflict.

After the Cardassians joined the Dominion in 2373, Gowron reinstated the Khitomer Accords, and posted a permanent contingent of Klingon officers on the Cardassian border at station Deep Space 9, commanded by Gen. Martok

In early 2374, Gowron was reluctant to involve the Empire in Operation Return. However, he was later persuaded to assist Captain Sisko's forces by Martok and Worf. The late arrival of the Klingon fleet proved critical in the battle, throwing the Dominion lines into disarray and allowed the Defiant to break through.

Martok's actions in the war had made him a prominent figure throughout the Empire and was regarded by the Klingon people as their savior. Threatened by Martok's growing political influence, Gowron took direct control of the Klingon Defense Force in 2375, and began to undermine Martok's military strategies.

Martok refused to challenge Gowron after such dishonorable actions. Instead Gowron was challenged by a member of Martok's house, Worf. Worf defeated Gowron in combat, killing him, and passed the leadership of the High Council to Martok. Despite his disapproval of Gowron's actions, Worf performed the Klingon death ritual for him, acknowledging the former chancellor as a Klingon warrior.



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Thursday, November 24, 2011

"Star Wars vs Star Trek" by Faldwin J. Bard and Christopher Fox Graham

The Shonare Vhekadla clan of the Manadalorian Mercs surprise
Faldwin J. Bardand Christopher Fox Graham at Bookmans
Here it is, nerds of the world. The duo poem Faldwin J. Bard and I wrote together for our Sunday, Nov. 20, poetry feature at Sundara in Flagstaff.

Writing with Faldwin was a lot of fun. We wrote the poem at Bookmans in Flagstaff, which coincidentally was visited that day by the Shonare Vhekadla clan of the Manadalorian Mercs.

Of course, I had my lightsabers in the truck and I was wearing my vintage Star Wars T-shirt, so, well perfect.


Beneath this handsome exterior


beats the heart of a nerd
and not your typical


“I’ve read the novelizations of the Harry Potter movies”
nerd
nerd
or “I Wikipediaed ‘Twilight’ to sleep with the girl at Bookman’s”

nerd
nerd

No
we’re NERDS
we’re NERDS
Spend six months working on a costume for a three-day convention

NERDS
NERDS

Memorize the inner workings of interstellar starships
NERDS
NERDS
Spend more money on an authentic prop than I do on my girlfriend

NERDS
NERDS

Become fluent in a fictional language I’ll never be able to put on my resume
NERDS
NERDS
we devote our life to the greatest space epic of all time
we devote our life to the greatest space epic of all time
filled with alien races from exotic worlds


interstellar travel with impressive special effects
grand galactic space battles


exploding torpedoes
Of, course we’re talking about

Star
Star
Wars    Trek
Trek
Star Trek?
Star Wars?
Pointy-eared Vulcans and color-coded pajamas?


Wrinkly green gnomes and shit-colored bathrobes?
How is Star Trek better than Star Wars?


One word: Klingons


You mean wet dream machines for filler episodes?


Yeah ’cause nerds need to point out we only get laid once every seven years


So what’s so great about Star Wars?
Jedi Knights with Lightsabers


Grown men dancing around with flashlights?
The Force


Yeah, it was totally cool when Matilda did it
Mandalorians


Midi-chlorians. ‘Nuff said.

At least my technology makes sense

Give me some dilithium crystals and a forcefield and I can build you a warpdrive

because I have the specs for that memorized

I doubt you can build a lightsaber
Whatever, I prefer my space epic focus on the characters not “Treknobabble

You fix a busted hyperdrive the same way you fix a busted TV

You hit it with Wookie


“Calibrates the vertarium cortenide power grid with compressed personnel transporters”


Why would you use vertarium cortenide for personnel transports?

The molecular structure isn’t complex enough to handle organic lifeforms
Stop! It’s not about technology, it’s about characters



C3PO is just a rusty servant with a shitty British accent


Did you just insult the silky smooth baritone of Capt. Jean-Luc Picard

the Barry White of the Milky Way?

at least he doesn’t sound like he’s been smoking two packs a day for 800 years

“emphysema, I have”

who trained Obi-Wan Kenobi,
“tumor causing, teeth staining,
smelly, puking habit”
Star Wars is a modern retelling of ancient Greek heroic epics:

a boy becomes a man

finds his father

Rescues him from himself

and saves the galaxy


or he’s a whiny brat with daddy issues who kisses his own sister
But with the Force

Star Wars is better (said while doing the Jedi Mind Trick)


Seriously?

Don’t use your Jedi Mind Trick on me

I will mindmeld your ass

faster than you can say Pon Farr
Wait, what’s the difference between a Vulcan and a Romulan again?


I’d explain, but we don’t have all night

Isn’t an Ewok a dwarf Wookie?
Lightsabers!


Holodecks!
The Force!


Mindmelds!
Mandalorians!


Klingons!
Gorram-it!
Gorram-it!

Wait, did you just say “gorram-it”?
Yeah


Shiny. You like “Firefly”?
Of course. Cowboys in space. What’s not to like?



So hot
So hot

It’s so messed up that it got canceled
Yeah, what the hell was Fox thinking?

(exit stage together)
(exit stage together)

Azami with the Shonare Vhekadla clan of the
Manadalorian Mercs at Bookmans
Azami sent the Mandalorians over to our table. Which is one reason why she's awesome.